College Football is HERE!

It’s finally here; productivity plummets in anticipation of your favorite team taking the field Saturday. When grown men and women stuff whiskey down their pants and in their bras minutes before kickoff even though they have been drinking since 10:30 am, but the fear of not having a drink for even 1 minute is more terrifying than having ur starting QB sat on by Terrance Cody.

Why do we do this? Cus were Fucking awesome and can still rage like were in college. And some of us are still in college like my good friend TBarry he is still living the dream going into his 7th football season!!! Some view this as excessive but I applaud him, who else has the audacity to have their parents pay for 6.5 years of out of state tuition, and admit it you would trade ur Day job to be in BaRrys shoes right now. Why is he still in school? Well there is the semester he took off claiming he was "studying abroad in the SEC" during which time he slept on my couch in the Burn for 2 week attending every Derby Days event and thus becoming an honorary Sigma Chi. He says they "dropped" the class he needed this summer. But I call Bullshit he even walked in the spring effectively faking his graduation going the whole 9 yards having family and friends come in for it. This is only a fraction of what this kid has accomplished in his tenure in Oxford. So in the spirit of College Football we salute You Thomas Barry for not surrendering to social norms that say u must graduate in 4 years and go get some dead end job. You say NO to the MAN even though ur going on 25 and Freshman girls probably think ur creepy, but that’s okay because when we wake up at 8am to go to work your sleeping in till noon or you may be up also but that is for a totally different reason.....

I pulled these classics off FaceBook